What’s makes me grumpy? Poor SIGN LANGUAGE.
Not the clever gesticulations of the person standing next to the premier, but street signs and other signs you see that are badly worded or with clumsy line breaks. Some are merely puzzles, others leave you wondering whether anyone has read them before printing.
Here is one:
ROAD
UNSUITABLE
FOR CYCLISTS
AHEAD
What? Surely they meant:
ROAD AHEAD
UNSUITABLE
FOR CYCLISTS
And there is this one at the hospital:
VISITORS ARE STRICTLY LIMITED
TO 1 VISITOR PER DAY
Poor lonely patients! But visitors can have a visitor a day?!
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Driving up the steep road from the underground loading docks at a shopping centre, there is this sign at exit to the road:
BEWARE OF PEDESTRIANS
Yep, they are fierce down there; carry clubs and everything! Well, we know what they mean I suppose.
And this one, at my local GP:
FACE MASKS MUST
BE WORN WITHIN
THE SURGERY
BUILDING
INCLUDING THE
BACK DECK UNDER
10 YRS NOT
INCLUDED
Oh, dear! Clearly, they are not typographers.
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Another signage habit that adds to my grumpiness is the practice of putting timed ‘CLEARWAY’ signs right where there are ‘NO STOPPING’ signs. What? Why is this? Where there are NO STOPPING signs, the road is already a clearway!
To show that I am not grumpy all the time, I want to applaud one sign that is clear, concise and imperative. You know that it must be obeyed. I hope never to be confronted with this one:
WRONG WAY
GO BACK
Thanks for reading. I feel better now …
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Do you have some ridiculous signs to share? What are the worst ones you’ve seen? Have your say in the comments section below.
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